England goalkeeper James and ex-Ryder Cup captain Torrance are among sports personalities who have hurt themselves in self-inflicted disasters. And they are not on their own...
'James has since seen the error of his ways and put down the joypad to finally cut out the crazy mistakes'
Sports people are often held up as finely honed physical specimens, uniquely
fit and perfectly coordinated. However, that perception doesn’t stop injuries
occurring, and whilst we have compassion if this occurs in a crunching
challenge or a collapsed scrum, there have been a few injuries over the years
that raise a smile rather than a vote of sympathy.
In the wake of Irish rugby player John Barclay’s unfortunate broken-glass
related hand wound, it seems worth looking at some more contenders for sport’s
stupidest injury.
We kick off this list with the unfortunate Santiago Canizares, the former Valencia goalkeeper. He was an
integral part of the Spanish squad running up to World Cup 2002 and a shoe-in
for the No.1 jersey throughout the tournament. Canizares was known as a safe
pair of hands, being possibly the best keeper in the world at that time, apart
from Gigi Buffon.
Sadly just days before flying to South Korea, his iron grip failed
him and Canizares dropped a bottle of perfume on his right foot, slicing a
tendon and being forced out for two months - and of course missing the finals.
Our second example of stupid sporting injuries concerns current England No.1 David James. Back in the days when he
was playing for Liverpool, James was not
necessarily the consistent and focused keeper he is now. After a particularly
poor run of mistakes during the 1996-97 season, he blamed his computer-game
habit for his lack of concentration.
However, on one occasion the video games did more than just hurt his
attentiveness. He had to miss a game due to RSI in his thumb, which he blamed
on playing video games excessively. He has since seen the error of his ways and
put down the joypad to finally cut out the crazy mistakes.
We head Stateside for our next painful encounter and meet baseball legend Ken Griffey Jr. There is not enough
space in this article to list all of Griffey's injuries, but one stands out as
the funniest. Ken once missed a game after his protective cup slipped and
pinched one of his testicles. Isn’t the cup supposed to stop you from getting
hit where it hurts? Maybe that’s the real reason why Griffey can never get fit.
(He also once strained his back lifting boxes and broke a bone in his right hand
when he slipped in the shower).
Golf is a sedate and relaxing sport compared to those mentioned so far, but
even this demure game is not exempt from freak injuries. Sam Torrance is mostly known for his golfing prowess and skill,
but there is another side to the prolific tournament winner.
During the 1993 Ryder Cup, he was snoozing peacefully in his hotel room
beside his wife Suzanne when, suddenly, he sat bolt upright and mistook a
medium-sized yucca tree in the room for a masked intruder. He was fast asleep
with his eyes open, and leapt out of bed. In tackling it, he broke a toe. He
had to miss the final-day singles matches. Not such a quiet night!
My personal favourite - and candidate for most stupid personally inflicted
injury in history - goes to baseball player John Smoltz. He is often mentioned as one of the best pitchers of
his generation and had fantastic career stats as he pitched for the Atlanta
Braves.
However, as good as his throwing arm remains, his domestic prowess can be
called into question. Smoltz, legend has it, once scalded himself ironing a
shirt – while he was wearing it! If this is true, then surely there is not a
story to beat it.
Do you know of any crazy injuries in sport? Post your comments below or submit an article to Sportingo.