Liverpool ace for Fulham; Manchester City and Bolton chase ex-Kop stars; Manchester United fury over Ronaldo

Not only Dudek, but also Mancini from Roma, Scannell from Palace, Vagner Love and Daniel Carvalho from CSKA, Oblimey Martins from the Jailbars (nooooooo!), Ashton from West Ham, Riquelme from Boca, Adriano "Spears" from Inter / Sao Paulo, Mascherano from Liverpool, Anelka from Bolton, Santa Cruz from Blackburn, Diarra from Arsenal, Bresciano from Palermo, Amelia from Livorno... ...and, rumour has it, Nelly Furtado to play just in front of the back four. I can't keep track, I'm sure I've forgotten another gross (that's 144 for those in or recently out of state schools) or so.

Fergie doesn't like when other clubs start to undermine his players with speculation about where they will be playing their football when the transfere window closes . Yet he is the biggest one at these mind games in english football when he wants a player . If he is that interested in players why is he not involved when the player is avalible in the first place.

Hold on, there's less: did you read that story in The Independent? Someone's leaked the fact that Ronaldinho's agent approached City to make an offer to Barcelona...'cos the King of Pies is worried his time is up in Catalonia and he figures Frank is a soft touch to give Sven 6m a year in wages. Oh, and City are also about to get Chimbonda and Alfonso Alves. NEXT! LOL.