We all have our pet peeves, especially when it comes to our favourite sport. Football is no exception – everyone must surely have something that really gets under their skin about the game they love. Some of these annoyances might include a frustrating player (Titus Bramble anyone?), a clueless manager (poor old Sam), “stating the obvious” commentary (laymen call it “duh!”), quiet fans (ask Fergie!), and the list goes on and on (feel free to throw in your greatest peeve).

The most popular irritant that crops up in footballing conversations involves poor refereeing decisions or just downright poor referees. It’s common to hear fans say, “Oh, we would have won the game if the ref saw that foul/allowed the goal/gave the penalty."

My greatest pet peeve, I think, is weird but I’m sure that a few fans out there would understand where I’m coming from. I find it really annoying that players choose ridiculous numbers for the position that they play in. It irritates me to see Ronaldo in the red and black of AC Milan with the number 99 (why, oh, why?) on his back. Is it really necessary to use such a big number if you’re a regular starter on a football team? I would understand a bit more if this were an American sport where they retire numbers for the many legendary players they have. For example, the Boston Celtics in the NBA have retired 21 jersey numbers already! This, however, is not practised in football, so why does a player so annoyingly choose a big number?

‘So many great No.9’s – Inzaghi, Torres, Andy Cole, Shearer, Crespo, Batistuta and lately Steven Sidwell…oh, he shouldn’t be there should he?’


Let me try to provide what I think should be the right numbers used for the starting XI of any squad, based on a 4-4-2 formation. Please correct me if I’m wrong.

Goalkeeper
1 – If anyone OTHER than a goalkeeper picks this number, he should be hung and shot, I say.

Defenders
2 – The right back owns it – Lee Dixon, Gary Neville, Cafu made this number proud. Furthest I’d tolerate is if you play anywhere in defence, so Abou Diaby, if you’re reading this, re-pick your number!
3 – Look no further than Paolo Maldini, the most legendary No.3!
5 & 6 – These belong to many great centre-backs, so why Zinedine Zidane chose the No.5 during his Madrid days is beyond me. John Terry, please, 26 makes you look daft!

Midfielders
4 & 8 – Centre-midfield numbers, with the No.4 usually belonging to the holding midfielder and the number 8 playing further up. Claude Makelele and Patrick Vieira, during his Arsenal days, are today’s great No.4’s, while you can’t look further than Steven Gerrard and Frank Lampard as today’s great scoring No.8’s!
7 & 11 – Cristiano Ronaldo and Ryan Giggs – right and left of Man Utd’s midfield – are a great example of why these numbers should belong to the wide attacking men.

Strikers
9 – Where do I even begin? So many great No.9’s – Inzaghi, Torres, Andy Cole, Alan Shearer, Hernan Crespo, Batistuta and lately Steven Sidwell…oh, he shouldn’t be there should he?
10 – Ah, the great play-makers of every great team wear this legendary number. Wayne Rooney, Dennis Bergkamp, Del Piero, Ronaldinho, Robinho ... you could fill an entire page easily. Some exceptions include typical centre-forwards like Ruud van Nistelrooy. So when William Gallas picked the No.10, I thought for a moment that maybe Arsene Wenger had transformed him from a defender into the next Thierry Henry.

Is there too much freedom in picking numbers nowadays? Maybe I'm just old-fashioned. Or maybe these guys are just plain annoying when they choose their jersey numbers.