Kevin Keegan seems to have breathed fresh life into Newcastle and with his arrival there are of course countless transfer targets supposedly heading to St James’ Park – here’s the latest batch of fantastical figments of tabloid imagination!

It has been reported that the Toon are considering an £18m bid for Arsenal’s hugely impressive midfielder Alexandr Hleb (various) as well as approaching Liverpool for their striker Peter Crouch in a deal reportedly in the region of £7m.

There is no doubt that Keegan will push his team in the right direction and I am sure that in time they can challenge for a top-six shot once again. However, the way big names have been bandied about you would think that they were title challengers all of a sudden. The truth is that it won’t be quite so easy to turn the ship around, and even a Magpies side at its peak will struggle to keep up with the likes of Man United, Arsenal and Chelsea. After all, it isn't  just bad luck that has prevented them winning any trophy of note for the best part of four decades.

‘Crouch could form a deadly partnership with Michael Owen, but there is simply no way that Hleb will abandon north London for the north-east.’


There are some targets well within their range – David Bentley of Blackburn, Tottenham’s Ledley King and  Anfield bit-part player Crouch may find a new challenge on Tyneside, In fact, Crouch could form a deadly partnership with Michael Owen, but there is simply no way that Hleb will abandon north London for the north-east, just like there is no way Dimitar Berbatov will do likewise.

Tottenham keeper Paul Robinson has apparently had enough and is set to hand in a transfer request (Daily Mail). The England butter fingers has been left out of the first team for the last four matches. Boss Juande Ramos has clearly lost faith in his goalie and has opted for Radek Cerny of late. Manchester City chief Sven Goran Eriksson is favourite to land the former Leeds stopper even though he has an army of talented young keepers at Eastlands.

Robbo has been left in the lurch somewhat in recent weeks, and even though he has bungled a fair few times this season it seems harsh to let him leave. On his day the 28-year-old is one of the best in the Premier League. Of course, this could all be part of a plan for Ramos to bring in the keeper of his choice, as he looks to re-build the Spurs side.