Spurs, Newcastle, Liverpool and Chelsea - top of the League of Idiots

Tue, Mar 04, 08 13:20
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Daniel Levy and Juande Ramos - more plans afoot? (Gettyimages.com)

Introducing the clubs whose chief executives and owners have made a complete foul-up this season . . .

'It is hard to argue that Levy was on the right track in wanting to replace Jol with Ramos. But the manner of doing so, the so-called “stab in the front” was such a bungled effort that it made Jol look like a martyr and Levy like a ruthless git'

you might think there have been some strange goings-on in the corridors of power in the Premier League this season - and we're talking chief execs and owners here. But these four pieces of "business" take some beating:

Idiot A: Daniel Levy at Spurs:

Although Levy looks like a James Bond villain with his tailored suit and meticulously shaved head, he was at least different in the execution of his cunning and evil plan. Instead of trussing up his quarry, detailing a complex plan to kill his target and then allowing his foe ample time to escape, Levy wanted a quick usurpation.

His plans were to decamp en masse to Spain, talk with Juande Ramos, and bring him back to the Lane after sending his head spinning with a dizzyingly fat pay cheque, thereby replacing a loveable Winnie the Pooh style manager with someone with a bit more of a cutting edge.

Alas, the whole thing was littered with as many gaffes and slip-ups as a Paul Robinson and Radek Cerny goalie coaching DVD. Not only were Levy’s power-suited acolytes caught talking with Ramos but the Spaniard then came clean and admitted he was given a dizzying offer by Levy.

It is hard to argue that Levy was on the right track in wanting to replace Jol (and his daily doughnut scoffing training sessions) with Ramos (and his tightly run fitness regimens). But the manner of doing so, the so-called “stab in the front” was such a bungled effort that it made Jol look like a martyr and Levy like a ruthless git.

That Levy failed to turn up alongside his new manager at a press conference on October 30 last year and instead allowed Damien Comolli to squirm in the face of questions, just made him look like a coward on top of the aforementioned gittishness.

Key Error: Spurs vice-president Paul Kemsley and club secretary John Alexander somehow being photographed talking to Ramos at the Hotel Alfonse XIII in Seville.

Idiots B: George Gillett and Tom Hicks at Liverpool:

Blustering into an historic football club that boasts the biggest trophy haul in English football, and then meddling to such an extent that the manager starts to get really p***ed off is never a good idea.

Add to this rumours that the American duo never intended hanging around for the long term, and simply bought Liverpool in order to sell it – as well as their public admittance that they courted Jurgen Klinsmann on the off chance that relations with Rafa would nosedive even further – and you have a veritable recipe for disaster.

Key Error: Coming out and publicly admitting that they had courtedKlinsmann; another bungled piece of mismanagement as bad as Levy’s treatment of Jol.         

Idiot C: Mike Ashley at Newcastle United:

The club owner was clearly going stir crazy waiting for a decent excuse to do away with manager Sam Allardyce and indulge his fantasy of bringing Toon duo Kevin Keegan and Alan Shearer to St James’ Park.

When Ashley couldn’t wait any longer, he gave Allardyce the boot, brought Keegan down from a ‘football circus’ in Scotland, and inexplicably appointed Dennis Wise to an executive role that is sure to increase the pressure on Keegan. Since Keegan’s appointment on January 16, he hasn’t won a Premier League game, securing two draws and four defeats.

Key Error: Two words - Kevin Keegan.

Idiot D: Roman Abramovich at Chelsea:

The Russian billionaire severed relations with Jose Mourinho and replaced him with the more pliant Avram Grant. Mourinho departed as the most successful manager in Chelsea’s history, and although Grant initially appeared to be doing well, his insipid coaching in extra time of the Carling Cup final highlighted exactly what Chelsea were missing.

Key Error: Getting rid of the most successful manager in the club's history, amid weeping and wailing from his players, and replacing him with a man who has all the vigour and character of distilled mud.

Is your club run by people who seem to be clueless? Post your comments below or submit an article to Sportingo.
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Comments
Nicky (04/03/2008 15:44)
...and spot on!
Frank (04/03/2008 15:48)
Your points on Messrs Gillett and Hicks are pretty accurate
Ryan (04/03/2008 16:03)
Abramovich may have become an idiot now, but he did bring Chelsea the most successful period in their history (I think....not a history expert for Chelsea!). Levy may have come out of the Jol scandal looking like a dick, but a trophy within 4 months kinda makes him look right in retrospect don't you think?
Pierre (04/03/2008 16:07)
Not worried about comments for other clubs, but you have not got a clue about passion and football, when it comes to Newcastle. Allardyce was hopeless, the points we got @ Fulham, 1 from 6 from Derby - that is relegation material. He had to go. Why not go for Keegan, it worked last time and will this time. I would rather go down with Keegan, come back and win the Premier League than watch the utter rubbish Allardyce gave us. We are where we are because of Allardyce, not Ashley and Keegan. In a years time, eat humble pie, as we won't go down and we will win something next year. Life is full of dreams.
(04/03/2008 16:51)
Daniel Levy really showed what sort of an idiot he is by bringing in the manager who secured Spurs first silverware of the century. Great comments - must be a gooner. What about Arsene and his stance on which players play in the carling cup. Granted they generally progress well in the tournament but gret progression still lacks a trophy!
P F (04/03/2008 17:14)
The whole Arsenal squad for acting like complete muppets when results dont go their way, e.g Wenger, Adebayor, Bentner and Gallas!
anthony fanciulli (04/03/2008 17:43)
Apart from the weekends disaster at the brum's, Ramos has worked wonders for us yids. Levi has done he's job and brought in a tactically astute manager. A manager who looks likely to compete with the big boy's. e.g. Ferguson and the French manager from that team Woolwich arseholes. Good riddens to Shrek. He was not quite what we needed. C.O.Y.S
Derek Britton (04/03/2008 18:05)
How come it is acceptable to tout for replacement of established members of a first team squad yet it is "back stabbing" to seek a replacement for the manager BEFORE you actually replace him. Surely it is the height of stupidity to sack someone without having approached the possible replacement.
The knower of al things (04/03/2008 19:49)
Spurs are on their way to a miserable time and a 13th place finish in the table.....what trophy did yous win?....eh?....eh?....eh?....yes you are correct i've never heard of it.Levvy is just a spoilt little rich nobody trying like many other rich nobodies to get known through football.Hes only in it to swell his ego as many others are.Bored with having a few million......hardly anywhere near Billions....hes trying to make himself herpo worshipped.Only the religous the stupid and football fans worship on this planet.
Kenny Harper (04/03/2008 22:09)
Well Done joe you didnt slag us off, a decent honest piece, nice one.
(05/03/2008 01:49)
dont u people think that levy's decision was proved right in the end?
Milkman Bagtativich (05/03/2008 03:39)
The fact is Fat ginger Fredrick Shepherds pie ruined NUFC and took of with millions he is so fat he will probably burst he is a sad old man with the disease of being ginger and never seen his small winkey in 23 years.
Dazza THFC (05/03/2008 11:33)
Spurs are on their way to a miserable time and a 13th place finish in the table.....what trophy did yous win?....eh?....eh?....eh?....yes you are correct i've never heard of it.Levvy is just a spoilt little rich nobody trying like many other rich nobodies to get known through football.Hes only in it to swell his ego as many others are.Bored with having a few million......hardly anywhere near Billions....hes trying to make himself herpo worshipped.Only the religous the stupid and football fans worship on this planet.
Does anyone else know what this guys talking about??
Dazza THFC (05/03/2008 11:42)
Funny Article!! Mike Ashley should have been #1 though!! I was thinking our (Spurs) premiership season was going bad, but what’s happened to Newcastle this season is a complete joke! Getting King Kev reminds me of when we brought in Hoddle, fans love them to bits but the end of the day their clueless!! Hearing KK post match interview is like listening to my mates Dad!! the guy is a joke! and so is Mike Ashley! I actually predicted Newcastle to finish 4th this season!
stokie (05/03/2008 16:07)
A: Spurs have won their first trophy in god know how long. B: Hicks and Gillett stand to make £25 mil for themselves C: If KK fails, Ashley can turn to the fans and say "I gave you who you asked for"
Geordie Following (06/03/2008 17:03)
How the hell can anyone comment on Kevin Keegan being a joke at Newcastle? He hasnt bought anyone and is playing with a team which already had zero confidence. Its just typical Journalists who cant be ar*ed to write anything properly so jump on the Newcastle band wagon. And then theres the armchair fans who read these articles and also jump on. Get over it man!!
Sean (08/03/2008 17:08)
Hello Dazza i think you are new to sportingo but if you follow that knower of all you will get his point even when you hate him for slagging your team he knows whats going on in the game and how we are all manipulated.He is atrue fan and on the side of all the fans.Most of the comments on this forum are petty and narrow minded but that guy tells what everybody what they think but won't admit.
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