Home > Football > Captain Keegan and the sinking SS Newcastle
Captain Keegan and the sinking SS Newcastle
Since King Kev arrived on a wave of optimism, the Toon have well and truly run aground. They now float just four points off the relegation zone and in deep trouble. Maybe Sam Allardyce wasn't such a bad bet after all...
by Jake Johnson on 20 March 2008
Email this Article (18) Comments
Free £10 bet when you register at
Picture the scene. It’s January 9, 2008 - the start of a new year. The Newcastle United board certainly think so as they ask Sam Allardyce to walk the plank after only nine months and 24 matches in the hottest hot-seat in football.
New owner and "man of the people" Mike Ashley wants to appease the Toon masses clamouring for a world-class manager. Several names are bandied about - Jose Mourinho, Didier Deschamps and Marcello Lippi are all linked to the job - but Ashley stays tight-lipped on who will take the helm of his sinking ship.
Newcastle are the stereotypical sleeping giant. They have one of the biggest and best stadiums in the country in the form of St James' Park. They also have some of the most loyal fans in the world in the Toon Army.
Yet they've not had a team to really shout about since the days of Kevin Keegan in the mid-90s. The fans demand success for their unquestionable loyalty and Ashley knows it. Because of this, he breaks a so-called fundamental rule of football: Never go back.
Fast-forward to January 16: King Kev returns as Newcastle United manager. Cue mass hysteria from the Toon Army and huge media coverage. Tyne newspapers read: "The King Has Returned", "All Hail King Kev" and "The Saviour Is Back". Fans begin to talk of Europe, of challenging for honours next season. "Keegan will lift the players. We'll break the big four in no time," is the call from many a Toon fan.
Now fast-forward to the present. Two months into the job and still no win for Keegan. For any other manager in the game this would be a disaster, but as it's Keegan the Newcastle fans won't call for his head - yet. However, the team still aren't playing well and the optimism that accompanied his arrival has well and truly left.
The media are now bored. They know it was a mistake to go for someone who, by his own admission, had seen around five football matches since he left Manchester City in 2002. Once again, Newcastle fans allowed themselves to get carried away with expectation, blind to the team's failings by a managerial appointment.
That team is now extremely low on confidence. Hardly a week goes by when we don't see one of the squad saying they back Keegan or that Michael Owen's goals will save them. They need to sit up and realise where all the talk and hype has taken them - to within four points of the relegation zone. It's getting so desperate that they were delighted to get a 1-1 draw with strugglers Birmingham.
What Newcastle need right now is someone who can bail them out of their current mess. Someone who can get the team to dig in and grind out a win or two to make the safety of mid-table. Someone like Sam Allardyce, perhaps?
Comments (18)
by dave on March 20, 2008
stop writing stupid fuckwit articles you jake the faggot
by tony taylor on March 20, 2008
what are you going to write when newcastle stay up and they do a chelsea next season
by S C on March 20, 2008
Sporingo Editor, You should consider firing this hack. Mindless, aimless newcastle bashing. If there is a bangwagon on the move you're sure to see Jack Johnson climbing aboard. What an IDIOT
by Chris Flynn on March 20, 2008
Honestly, Keegan may wear his heart on his sleeve, but you've got your agenda slapped right smack in the middle of your forehead. not had a team to shout about since keegan's team of the mid 90s? funny, i seem to recall us finishing 3rd, 4th and 5th under bobby robson, and competing in the champions league, getting to the second group stage. yeah, we've done nowt since keegan was last here. please, do get over yourself.
by tony green on March 20, 2008
Derby County are probably going down with the lowest points haul ever in the Premiership.Four of the points they have gained have been against the "TOON",whilst under Sam Alladyce's stewardship.Perhaps you need to do a bit more research before coming out with so much "bollocks" about Nufc and Special "K"
by Joel Teaague on March 20, 2008
Good grief, man. This is poor. All of it. But worst of the lot has to be the conclusion that the best person to bring us out of the nosedive (which KK has managed to wrestle up to level) is the guy who shoved the joystick forward in the first place. At least it took top-4 teams to beat us under KK - Derby made us look average under BSA.
by hate the southern press on March 20, 2008
Mate, stick to the day job cos writing a well informed article about football is not your strongest suite. This is Allardyce's team we are having to put up with, he's taken the club back 15 years, he should be strung up for what he's done to our club, even Roeder was better than him. His idea is to defend for 90 mins hoping to nick a goal, that will never work at NUFC we shouldn't and won't put up with that rubbish. KK's teams might be getting beat but we are seeing the team at least trying to pass the ball and if we stay up we'll be better next year.
by Ray Mossom on March 20, 2008
What a complete load of tosh. KK is a much better bet for NUFC than Allerdyce. We will stay up & watch us go next year
by UTD111 on March 20, 2008
PERSONAL ABUSE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED - nice header But its ok for this nutter to spend an entire article abusing Sir Kevin?
by Jonny on March 20, 2008
Great fans and stadia are all very well but until they enlist some defenders who can defends and some midfielders who can attack they won't advance.
by MiMo on March 20, 2008
My advice to Newcastle fans is don't rise to the bait. Just make a mental note of those bandwagon jumpers and bitter malcontents who have taken against the club. In 2-3 years from now the Toon are going to be back challenging for the champions league.
by mark ronalds on March 20, 2008
hahah lol, what a waste of bytes. Did you get paid for this article u numpty??
by Karl Willi on March 20, 2008
Yaaaaaaaaaaawn!
by Supermac on March 20, 2008
Nice one, scoop ! How can you say " two months into the job and the optimism that accompanied his arrival has well and truly left " ?? Did you do some sort of survey ? Keegan is trying to work with the results of the downward spiral the club's been in since the sacking of Robson...misrule and mismanagement. Souness in particular should bear some responsibility for the position we find ourselves in now, as should Shepherd. All we crave is football played, preferably to feet, on the floor, not long hopefull balls, and the easy squandering of posession. Crisp passing and movement, attacking wingers, taking the game to the other team, and a bit of flair. Losing teams who play like this are generally applauded off the field, but this style of football generally wins more games than it loses. It forces the other team to try to stop it...that is what Keegan, and Robson brought to our club. And for that we are eternally grateful. You should teach journalism at college mate...you'd do a great job teaching people first hand about generalisation, sweeping statement, innaccurate factual presentation to justify innaccurate conclusion, and lazy journalism in general. I wouldn't enrol, like... ;0)
by Wendy Ramos on March 21, 2008
I thought it was a well researched piece of modern day journalism actually. Afterall Newcastle are shite and this big club myth is starting to wear a bit thin after decades and decades of failure
by Dora Arkwright on March 21, 2008
I'm 92 years old and am pretty disgusted at the language you youngsters use when conversing about football. It wasn't like this in my day, when friendly banter was an acceptable form of communication. I think you should all be ashamed of yourselves and would request that you refrain from using such vulagarities in the future. On a lighter note I think Kevin Keegan is fucking useless when it comes to football management; but is probably well suited at a wank club like Newcastle. Big Club?....don't make me piss my pants (again)
by Spursywursy on March 22, 2008
I am a devout spurs fan wea re the geordies of the south because of the following points: We are a big club we are gona win this we are gona win that we should be in the top 4,the past the past thepast,we are the best fans we are the most pasionate,we are a big club we are a big club despite having nothing to back it up we are a big club,we should be in the CL we are a big club.................YOU SEE WE ARE THE GEORDIES OF THE SOUTH!!!
by JD Geordie on April 11, 2008
It seems comical that people enjoy pretending to be Big Sam, An old woman and Mrs Keegan....personally I stopped pretending to be people when I was five...but I can see how this bad language and childs play proves Newcastle and Keegan are bad....idiots. Sorry Keegan came second in the premier league, he would have came first if given the time and money, we had a crap chairman and also the refs weren't on our side they way that they always are with Man United. I'm sure there is a kids site somewhere where you lot may be able to go and pretend to be old women and such things...but don't do it on an adult's site children...
Add your comment here
PERSONAL ABUSE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED
First Name
Last Name
Email
Heading
Display your favourite sport or football team badge with your comment.
Sport
League
Team
Comment *
Please enter the text you see in the picture into the textbox below. *