I have a friend, a very vociferous, forthright friend, who insists that it is totally unacceptable to follow the fortunes of two teams.
He has, from a certain point of view, a point; but his intractable opinion extends beyond national divisions, beyond international boundaries and I suspect, if he was pushed on the subject, even the very sports themselves.

To explain, he’s a Sunderland fan, and we were out watching the Liverpool v Arsenal game; a game where he refused to take a side. And as Emmanuel Adebayor rose to power home the opener, the conversation turned to why he couldn’t, for one game only, pick a team to back. He maintained he was a Sunderland fan and that was that.

Fair enough. Now I’m a fervent Stockport County fan, and have been since the entertaining but not-so-heady days of Mike Summerbee’s player-manager stint in 1978-79. I’m as County as they come, yet I celebrated as if Liam Dickinson [County’s leading marksman] had slotted home when Dirk Kuyt got the equaliser. Why? Cos I reckon you cannot possibly enjoy a match if you don’t have a preference. Even if it’s only for 90 minutes. What’s the point?

I’m still trying to work out who to follow at the Euro Championships in the summer, or else that’s going to be an appalling month. Damn you, Steve McClaren'


I’m still trying to work out who to follow at the Euro Championships in the summer, or else that’s going to be an appalling month. Damn you, Steve McClaren.

Anyway, if the Arsenal/Liverpool game wasn’t on, and County weren’t playing, I’d look out for Hyde United results – another team my dad took me to see as a nipper; same game but different league – I don’t see the problem. I also look out for Ross County results (familial association). 

This is clearly unacceptable to my Mackem mate. He’s not taking sides with a different team, no matter if it’s in the same country but a different division (‘But I’m not FROM Yeovil!!’), a different country at the same standard (‘Norwegians should NOT be allowed to support Liverpool!’), or even a completely different sport (‘They play in black-and-white, I’m not supporting the Geelong Cats!’). He’s simply not having it.

Now I get that passions run high in the North East of England and I get that the Mackem/Geordie rivalry instils an obsession in the local populace that goes way back to the 17th century (‘It’s all about the coal!’, my friend regularly rants as the lads head for the bar/loo/door, a reference to King Charles I and the favouritism he showed to Newcastle in 1642). But I think he’s maybe taking it a bit too far.

Ninety minutes (96 if it’s Old Trafford and United are losing) of transferred allegiance doesn’t make you any less of a fan, I’d argue. I don’t think he’d have his season ticket impounded if he was spotted raising a clenched fist to an AS Roma goal, or letting rip a ‘Get in!’ if Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink poked home for Cardiff in Sunday's FA Cup semi-final. Besides, he’s not even in the North East!

We both live and work in Dubai. So, if we ever fancied a live game, and went to watch a Al Wasl/Al Shabab game, surely for 90 minutes he’d have to pick a side? You’re not going to get any enjoyment purely from the skills on show at a UAE league game, now are you?