Sportsmen the world over, it seems, are haunted by freak injuries. I’ve been putting together a compendium of the most bizarre - and it seems they traverse just about every sport there is.

Football (the world game, that is, not the American grid-iron version) seems to throw up more freak injuries than any other sport - with goalkeepers invariably the victims. That’s why I’ve allotted two spots to the woes of those particular guys.

I hope US readers will forgive me for not including American Football and indeed, only really touching on baseball and golf of the main sports in the States. Bet you guys have loads of stories of loony accidents on your side of the pond, so please feel free to hit me via the comments section. Anyway here goes with a British woman’s eye view of the madcap injury brigade...

BASEBALL: This mainly American sport is arguably riddled with more bizarre injuries than any other. Atlanta Braves pitcher John Smoltz allegedly once scalded himself while ironing a shirt – while he was wearing it. Mind you, despite all the rumours, he does insist it never actually happened! Then there was Glenallen Hill of Toronto Blue Jays, who fell out of bed and crashed into a glass table - with rather bloody consequences - while having a nightmare about being covered in spiders. Adam Eaton of the San Diego Padres accidentally stabbed himself in the stomach with a paring knife while trying to unwrap a DVD, and Bret Barberie missed a game for the Florida Marlins after rubbing chilli juice in his eyes. And how about Milwaukee Brewers star Steve Sparks, who got so carried away at a motivational speaking seminar that he dislocated his shoulder trying to rip a phone book in half?

FOOTBALL (1): In 1975, Manchester United goalkeeper Alex Stepney managed to dislocate his jaw while shouting at his defenders during a game against Birmingham. England keeper Chris Woods was KO'd from a game after cutting a finger open wrestling with the string on his tracksuit bottoms with a penknife - and Spain's Santiago Canizares missed the 2002 World Cup in Japan and Korea after dropping a bottle of aftershave on his foot. Other keepers sidelined by bizarre injuries include Wimbledon’s Dave Beasant, who dropped a salad cream bottle on his foot while making a sandwich; Brentford’s Chic Brodie (kneecap shattered by a dog that ran onto the pitch and knocked him over); American Kasey Keller (knocked out his front teeth while pulling his golf bag from the boot of his car; and Grimsby’s Aiden Davison (felled by a hard-boiled egg during a game against Fulham).

FOOTBALL (2): Spare a thought for Millwall’s Bryan King, whose team-mate Billy Neil misguided a pulled punch in a pre-match prank - and whacked the Lions goalkeeper in the eye with his sovereign ring. The wound required six stitches. Wycombe Wanderers' Frank Talia missed the start of the 2004/05 season after slicing off a toe when he fell over while mowing his lawn. And in 1985, Argentina goalkeeper Nery Pumpido almost lost a finger in training when he caught his wedding ring on a rogue nail on the crossbar.

TENNIS: Belgian queen Kim Clijsters had to take two days off after tripping over her dog Diesel... while she was playing football. Goran Ivanisevic had to withdraw from a tournament in Miami in 2003 when he stepped on a sharp seashell as he strolled on a Florida beach, and on another occasion the Croatian needed stitches when he tried to head the ball over the net only to bang heads with his doubles partner Mark Philippoussis, who was himself concussed.

TRACK AND FIELD: The pre-race hype for the 1984 Olympic women’s 3000 metres final billed it as a duel between South African Zola Budd - running for Great Britain - and American world champion Mary Decker. Neither of them won a medal - but the event went down as one of the most controversial in history after Decker fell and injured her left hip in a collision with Budd, putting her out of the race. Budd could only finish seventh and was pilloried by the crowd and US media for an act that many saw as deliberate. However, Decker said many years later: “The reason I fell, some people think she tripped me deliberately. I happen to know that wasn’t the case at all. The reason I fell is because I am and was very inexperienced in running in a pack.’’

RUGBY: During the post-match banquet after England‘s Five Nations victory in Paris in 1982, challenges were issued between the teams to a drinking competition. England forward Maurice Colclough had earlier emptied the contents of his gift bottle of after-shave into an ice-bucket and replaced it with water. He drank it in front of the England prop Colin Smart, who then copied Colclough by swallowing a bottle of the real thing. Smart ended up in hospital having his stomach pumped, prompting the England scrum-half Steve Smith to observe: "Colin was in a bad way, but his breath smelled lovely."

GOLF: Happy-go-lucky Supermex Lee Trevino even managed to retain his sense of humour after being struck by lightning during the Western Open near Chicago. Along with playing partner Jerry Heard, a shocked Trevino was rushed to hospital following the incident, which left him lying semi-conscious on the 13th green at the Butler National Club. ''I could see the next morning’s headline - Supermex Becomes Super-Ex,’’ he joked. As he began to recover in hospital, the chunky little Texan put a call through to his wife. ''How do you feel?'' asked worried Claudia. ''Sensational,'' replied her irrepressible husband. ''For the first time in my life, I was six-foot two!'' Trevino’s advice for any golfer in danger of being struck by lightning is to hold up a one-iron for protection. ''Even God can’t hit a one-iron,'' he insisted.

BASKETBALL: In 1992, former Red Star Belgrade star Boban Jankovic’s career was tragically ended when he lost his cool in a Greek League playoff game between Panionios and Panathinaikos. When the referee wiped out a Jankovic basket and instead called him for an offensive foul, Jankovic slammed his head hard against the goal post, causing permanent damage to his spinal cord. He spent the rest of his life in a wheelchair before his premature death in 2006 at the age of 42.

BOXING: Former British heavyweight boxing champion Jack Bodell was a clumsy customer in every way. So much so that when American heavyweight Jerry Quarry was asked if he'd found Bodell awkward, a bystander said: ''Jack fell awkwardly.'' In reality, Bodell was so awkward that he once tripped himself up when crossing the ring to receive instructions from the referee. And worse still, he sliced off two of his toes with a lawnmower at his Derbyshire home.

CRICKET:  During the 1967/68 tour of the West Indies, England vice-captain Fred Titmus was out swimming when he caught his foot in the propellor of a boat. He lost four toes and for a time there was a doubt whether he would ever play again. But months later he was back in action for Middlesex and in fact claimed 111 victims with the ball that season and also headed Middlesex's batting averages.