Bob Marley originally wailed: ''There's a rat in the kitchen, what am I going to do?'' and Springbok fans are still left pondering this question after their ''scripted'' exit from this year's Tri-Nations.

SANZAR is a Southern Hemisphere rugby union committee hastily put together to handle the billion dollar finacial implications of television's interest in the Tri-Nations. South African rugby fans have nothing but contempt for this corrupt tryst which they believe scripts the tournament for maximum profits rather than to reflect the relative strengths of the teams.

The Springboks have been left on the wrong end of a forex currency converter ''ditch'' as profits in matches between New Zealand and Australia have outstripped matches involving South Africa. In their eyes, this equation has simplified the logistical arrangments of the Tri-Nations and has led to scripting to ensure Bledisloe Cup-type finishes.

Springbok fans left with this ''rat'' in their rugby union kitchen turn to boxing and the greatest boxer in history and his battles for respect within Don King's corrupt world of sport.

Muhammad Ali's battle against the media is similar to the Springboks' challenge at the moment. My own all-time favourite sports book is King of the World, by David Remnick, the Pullitzer Prize-winning editor of the New Yorker magazine, who manages to capture the essence of the Liston-Ali (and my Springbok vs Oz/NZ) challenge.

In Remnick's book, Cassius Clay, as he was then, has just destroyed the Sonny Liston ''greatness'' myth and wants his dues from the reporters who thought Liston would put him in a hospital bed - much like where current reporters put the Springboks. Consider this short passage, for the light it casts on the challenges of Springbok rugby...

"I'm gonna show you how great reporters are," Ali said. "Who's the greatest?"

There was no reply.

"No justice. I don't get no justice. No one's gonna give me justice. I'll give you one more chance. Who's the greatest?"

There was a pause. Then a few reporters muttered: "You are."

If South African rugby can nail down the ''moving goalposts'' manipulated by SANZAR and get the rat trap to swing on these Tri-Nations SANZAR rats (Oz & NZ) then they too, like Ali, will demand respect and a simple answer in their favour to the question: Who's the greatest in rugby union?

But as long as the ''big cheese'' remains in Oceania, the answer is unlikely to be THE SPRINGBOKS and the snap at their backs with metronomical monotony will be the door slamming as they exit the Tri-Nations to join the major MONEY watching All Black and Wallaby finals.